Monday, July 25, 2011

Letter from Elder Rife~July 25, 2011

Well...definitely a rough week for me this week. A rough week for everyone in the Rife family, and anyone who knows my amazing mother. Last weekend really just felt like it was a nightmare. I was waiting to wake up, but I never did. A lot of emotions for me in the last few days. But the bottom line is that I know everything will be okay in the end. I've been praying for comfort just about every minute of every day and I am so thankful for everyone's prayers in my behalf. Oh and I will be fasting July 31st along with the RM's from Daejeon for my mom. Anyone who reads this email and would be willing to fast for my mom please do! Thanks so much.

The whole weekend I was just trying to avoid the bitter thoughts that came to my mind like, Why is this happening to our family? More importantly, Why is this happening to my mom? She's the most amazing person in the whole entire world (if someone disagrees I will fight them). She doesn't deserve to have this disease. Then I realized that if anyone can handle something like this with "cheerfulness" and "patience" then it is my mom. Why should I worry right now? She's going to heaven! No matter how much comfort I felt I still couldn't stop crying. I've never cried so much in my entire life. You never realize how much you truly love someone until something happens to them. I've been praying to have patience to be able to wait until I can understand why this is happening to our family right now. Why this is happening to my mom. I probably won't know for a while. But I do know that our family will be a lot closer and we will make the most of the time that we have with my mom.

Mom, first of all, I just want you to know how much I love you. I love you with all of my heart. I'm sorry for all of the times I was ever rude to you and wasn't obedient or anything like that. I couldn't stop thinking about that this weekend. I have so many regrets. I should've been a better son. You said that what you want more than anything is for me to stay out here and stay focused and be the best missionary that I can possibly be. While I can't be at home to take care of you for the next little while, I can be an excellent missionary for you. I will work my butt off. I promise! We don't really know how much time you have left, but I really hope that the Lord blesses you with more time so that I can spend as much time as possible with you after my mission. I hope this last week you have realized how many people love you and would do absolutely anything for you. The whole ward would be right by your side to take care of you. Same with our whole family, cousins, all of your friends, and all of the missionaries from Daejeon. I'm sure there are a lot more people too. Everyone loves you, Mom. You have so much support.

Now on to the normal missionary stuff. Last week was transfers. My new companion is Elder Ishino from Salt Lake. He's half Japanese. We get along really well and he put up with me this last weekend through everything that happened. We really do get along well. We had three new investigators this week.. 강사라 (girl), 김현호(boy), 김건중(boy). The first two mostly have English interest.. Sarah Kang has been reading a little from the Book of Mormon though and our lesson last week went really well. The last one wants to go to BYU and was a referral from our Stake Patriarch's daughter. He's really interested in our church and we will teach him the first lesson next week. So this next week should be really good. We have potential to baptize 4 or 5 people this transfer which would be really good. I'm set to pass off with zone leaders in two weeks then I'll meet with the AP's two weeks after that. I need to study a lot. Yikes.

I set a lot of goals for this next transfer. I think that's one of the good things about a mission.. Every six weeks you can look at all of the areas you want to improve and set goals. I set spiritual, mental, and physical goals. My life used to revolve around physical goals so it's good to get the spiritual and mental goals in there too. ha.

Not much else happened this last week. It was a really hard week and I don't know how I made it through it. I hope that everyone in my family is taking good care of my mom since I can't be there. I'm sure they are. It would be nice to get to be with my family during this hard time but I know that they will all be blessed, especially my mom, for me being out here right now. If there's anything I can do for you, Mom, or anyone else please let me know. I pray for you constantly and miss you and love you. Every time I think about you I start crying. Anyway, thanks to everyone for all of the prayers and support this week. And Mom, you are an inspiration in my life and in the lives of so many. Don't forget that your friends and family will do anything for you so don't be afraid to ask.

I love you all!

-Elder Rife

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